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Welcome To My Ted Cruz Nightmare

October 21, 2013


If the thought of this demonic senator from Texas becoming our next president doesn’t scare the hell out of you, then nothing will. That is where his aspirations lie and there are a lot of stupid people who support him. The republic of Texas has become known for producing the most evil, idiotic idealogues ever to set foot on the national political stage. Remember George W. Bush and Rick Perry? If Texas wants to secede from the Union, I say “Good riddance!”

Ted Cruz, the love-child of Rush Limbaugh and Ann Coulter, came from relative Texan obscurity and, in just two short years, became the most controversial figure on Capitol Hill. Tea Party morons love him while everyone else hates and/or fears him. Only a junior senator with the backing of the Dark One could cause the federal government to shut down, costing America at least $24-billion in the process and, at the same time threaten the entire world with American insolvency.

Any intelligent American knows that Cruz is wrong for this country, but how to get rid of him is a problem exacerbated by the process of gerrymandering. Only the Texans who elected him can vote him out of the Senate, and that can’t happen until 2016. Cruz has received death threats via Twitter since the shutdown, but no one has yet attempted to take him out physically.

Ted Cruz and his followers are terrorists who have managed to do what Al Qaeda couldn’t… bring America to her economic knees. How do we deal with terrorists? We use drones to blow them to bits. So, when you wake up screaming from this nightmare – on Halloween and beyond – only thoughts of total annihilation of the tea party will allow sugarplums to once again dance in your dreams. Does anyone out there have a spell that would send these demons back to hell and seal the door shut for all time?

I’m a fiscal conservative but, if Cruz showed us anything, it’s that his way is the highway to oblivion. There are a lot of ways to cut federal spending that wouldn’t hurt us average Americans, but they never appear on the table. As for his cruz-sade against Obamacare, he should allow this law of the land to be implemented and play itself out before deciding that it’s wrong for the rest of us.

Happy Halloween, Everybody!

8 Comments leave one →
  1. Anonymous permalink
    October 21, 2013 5:53 PM

    I am working on that spell…. don’t know if it can overpower the “stepford” mentality that is a Southern epidemic… people have given themselves chemical lobotomy’s and truth means nothing. Their God is as bad as the Taliban’s but as powerful with the hate message they send… and they have GUNS! The Tea Party is the 21st Century KKK and the “South will rise again” even if they destroy the Country doing it….

    • October 22, 2013 11:08 AM

      Thanks for your comment. While the South is largely to blame, there are pockets of tea-party extremism all across the country. Two examples are Michele Bachmann from Minnesota and Sarah Palin from Alaska. To this day the Klan is still active so the tea-party is not going to disappear any time soon. We can only hope that good will triumph over their evil and that all intelligent voters will get to the polls. Meanwhile, we must keep exposing the tea-party klan for what it is. Keep working on that spell though.

  2. October 24, 2013 12:35 AM

    Sorry to give you the bad news, but Cruz isn’t up for re-election until 2018. But it’s probably safe to say that he’s not going to be president, considering that he’s probably the least popular politician among the non-Tea Party voters.

    • October 24, 2013 10:46 AM

      Thanks for correcting my math, X. I looked it up and saw that he was elected in 2012 and I know the term for a senator is 6 years, but I’m getting old and apparently can’t add 6 and 12 anymore. I live in the 2nd reddest state so I feel the idiocy of crazy-assed republicans every day. We have a totally inept, tea-party-darling governor who is running for re-election in 2014. If someone opened up with a shotgun in the state house, they would have a hard time hitting a democrat. This state went for Gingrich in the last primary and Romney in the general election. I’m sure it would whole-heartedly embrace Cruz as a viable presidential candidate. Given all this, and the fact that so many people fell for Sarah Palin, worries me that the electorate is getting stupider and that eventually a radical right-wing extremist might make it to the White House. I hope you’re right, but the possibility haunts my dreams.

      • October 25, 2013 3:04 PM

        I can see how living in a red state can give that impression. Hopefully, it’s not as bad in the general population – though, of course, it’s the same general population that voted for G.W.Bush twice.

  3. November 20, 2013 12:22 PM

    As soon as I convince everyone else I know to move you can go with us! Don’t hold your breath.

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