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The Clown Who Would Be President

July 7, 2012

There once was a wealthy clown named Rozo that made a bazillion dollars by taking over companies, running them into bankruptcy, and sending jobs overseas. He wasn’t a very good clown and he wasn’t very popular. He was only a legend in his own mind. Yes, his antics made people laugh, but not because he was funny. They laughed AT him because he was so absurdly pathetic. His ego was bigger than his bloated bank account. He thought he could do anything and do it better than anyone else. People ridiculed him because no one likes an egomaniac with no substance, morals or talent. Naturally, Rozo mistook their ridicule for praise.

One day his ego became so large that he decided to run for President of the United States as a republican. He didn’t win the nomination his first time out, but remained undaunted and ran again four years later. Because Rozo was such a bad candidate, the republican voters tried and tried to find an alternative to him but couldn’t. So, they held their noses and made him their nominee. He tried to master the art of lying, but he was as inept at that as he was at everything else. To all intelligent citizens, every word that came out of his mouth was obviously false, but republicans can’t tell the difference. They poured vast amounts of money into Rozo’s campaign in order to defame and defeat his opponent – the honest, moral and compassionate Obama.

In the general election, the majority of voters could see Rozo for the lying buffoon that he was, and saved the country from evil, republican domination by electing The Obama to a second term. Rozo’s huge ego wouldn’t allow him to admit defeat so he plans to run again and again until he finally becomes President. For now, he has strapped his dog to the top of his clown car and taken his clown family on an extended and expensive vacation. The country’s wounds have been healed by The Obama and prosperity has returned to all the people.

The moral of this story is that all the money, lies and self-delusion in the world can’t turn a clown into an effective leader. The majority of voters in America are smart enough to see through all that and do the right thing.

3 Comments leave one →
  1. July 7, 2012 5:07 PM

    Hear, hear!

  2. July 8, 2012 12:46 AM

    You can’t turn a clown into an effective leader, but history shows that a clown can still become president. See “Bush, George W.”

    • July 8, 2012 8:27 AM

      Welcome X! That’s exactly what I was thinking when I substituted the words “effective leader” for “president”.

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